Do you let your young children use "technology"?

Question

I'll be having my first daughter in a couple of weeks. My husband and I decided that we won't allow her to have iPad, iPhone, handheld electronic games, Xbox, wii, a t.v. In her room or let her watch more than 2 movies at the theater a month.

We want her to play outside, use her imagination, do crafts, read, play with toys and most of all socialize with other children.

What is your approach on this?
How was your childhood?
And how different is it from your children's childhood now?

Thank you!

Answer 1

Realistically, by the time your yet-to-be-born daughter is actually old enough that ANY of this will be relevent, technologyh and its place in society will have changed so much that it's simply not possible to speculate what you will or will not allow your adolescent or teenage daughter.



When I was a child none of these items existed, except for the tv. We had two tvs in our home, one in the living room and one in my parents room. The TVs got 4 channels.



My daughter is now a young adult/college student. When SHE was quite young, none of these items existed (except the tv, and she didn't have one in her room) There WERE computers, and we owned one. She played games on it and, as time passed, participated in various on-line sites, and generally used the computer sensibly.



In the past few years she has acquired a couple of gaming systems (Wii, Playstations, Nintendo), a tablet (which she needs for her college work), a laptop (ditto), an Ipod and a tv in her room (not hooked up to the cable; just for games.) She has a basic cell-phone.



And, FWIW, she reads a great deal, does crafts, (she's an art major in college), and spends time with friends. And always has.

Answer 2

Technology has its place. And whether you like it or not, children are going to have to know how to use it. My son is in the 5th grade, and uses a computer daily. He HAS to. Knowing your way around a computer is a vital skill, and the best way to learn when young - is to play games. There are TONS of educational computer games. And educational games for handheld and console units.



We have an Xbox. We have a Kinect. There are some great games for it for children. They don't have to be on it all the time. An hour a day. An hour every few days. Or just on the weekends. They get online and play against their friends. They can play with their cousins across the country! It's wonderful.



They still go outside and play - A LOT. My son is a second degree black belt in taekwondo and takes classes five days a week. My daughter is in gymnastics two times a week. Both take swimming lessons twice a week. I can barely keep up with their schedules! They read every night (they have books stacked beside their beds with flashlights).



Banning all things technology isn't going to make your child more creative or more outgoing. And I really don't see why you would want to put a limit on their social life (ie - how many movies they can watch). You can still be active and social and creative - AND have a foot in technology. Technology is not evil. And like it or not - it is part of the world we live in.

Answer 3

We allow almost all age appropriate technology. And what I mean by that is any game/app etc that is geared to our child's age we allow. Of course we look at the game or the app first. But my kids (3 and 5 years old) play with the iPad, iPhone, xbox and wii to some extent. And we have for ABC mouse.com to provide learning games and activities for our laptop.



At this point there is no need to regulate it too much. They still love to play outside every day. They still do traditional art and drawing everyday. They still play with dolls etc everyday. As long as the technology is in addition to other activities and is age appropriate, I see nothing wrong with it.



My husband is a game programmer for mostly the iPad, and iPhone. So these things are part of our lives to begin with. It is all around us. I can't image not allowing them to have access to this technology to at least some extent. And some of the apps and games really foster creativity and learning.



My was born in 1973. So this is totally different than my childhood. My parents didn't even own a computer until after I graduated high school. I wish I had access to much of the technology my kids have today. There are some amazing things out there.

Answer 4

My husband and I made some decisions regarding technology also, prior to getting married. And we have stuck to them. Our kids are two boys 8 and 4, and twin girls 6 who are all about to advance in age, and a 6 month old daughter.



They don't have televisions in their rooms. We have a movie room and there are televisions in the family room and great room. We normally watch movies together. We do have Xbox, PS3 and Wii in the family room, but they are only allowed to play with them Friday and Saturday, and we usually end up playing more family games on them than anything.



They have access to a computer, laptop and iPad and printer if they need it but we have an extensive library where they can research anything and that is their preference. Out kids go outside everyday for at least an hour. We have a nature trail in our community and they love "hiking" or riding their bikes with some of the neighborhood kids. They share a camera and take pictures of different birds, bugs (yic lol), plants and upload them onto the computer and sometimes print out pictures for framing. We also have an area for crafts, coloring, painting, model cars, legos (yes, these are restricted to that area because they hurt when stepped on...lol) etc. Our kids also have chores, are responsible for cooking a meal on Wednesday and cleaning after, and as they get older their responsibilities will increase.



We do believe they should interact on a limited basis with technology and kids pick it up very quickly. It has it advantages, but kids also need to get outside and explore, read and be creative. My childhood was pretty much the same as theirs.

Answer 5

we have one tv for a house of 6 people, and no cable. two months a year we go "unplugged" and have no screen time except as needed for homework. the rest of the year, we impose time limits. but we own, and the kids enjoy, a wii, a desktop that's shared among the four kids, and the tv. my husband and i also lend out our ipads to the kids on occasion and my oldest daughter has a kindle. we see a movie in a theater probably 2-3 times per year. my kids spend tons of time outside and on non-tech activities, and a large amount of time playing with friends.



one thing i'll draw to your attention is that from about the age of 9, or 10, playing video games together or computer programming together *is* a way for kids to socialize (in boy circles, a particularly popular one), just like playing board games or building legos can be. and it can be creative or active, as well: my kids do programming, making computer art, video editing, and composing music on the computer, use the kindle to download good books faster than i could restock them at the library, and use the wii fit and various wii dance games to get a ton of exercise on the days the weather is awful. of course too much of anything, tech toys certainly included, is a bad thing, but in moderation it's not -- particularly for older children.



i grew up with an atari 2600, a Commodore PET which i learned how to program, and unlimited tv. notwithstanding all that, and even though i watched way more tv than i allow my own kids, i had a fantastic childhood, mostly spent outside or reading a book. ( i've never had a tv in my room in my life except when i lived in a dorm and had only one room).

Answer 6

Technology is a necessary evil. While one could argue that it limits children, it also opens the world to them. Both children have iPods. They would love iPads, but it is too easy for them to access material I would prefer they not have access to until they are older. They are only allowed to use media in common rooms in our house. My husband and I check on them periodically and occasionally check the history on the computers. So far we have not had any issues. We do discuss internet safety regularly.



On dreary days, my son can play xbox online with his friends who are also confined to their home. At the same time, he can play in a room with people from different parts of our country and different parts of the world. Granted, they mostly talk about the game, but he also gets a chance to hear differing opinions from a variety of locations. When he was younger, the games were primarily educational and his time was very limited, not that it was necessary because he preferred to be on the go or playing with his building blocks and legos. Now that he is older, they are less educational and more fun/social. I'd prefer they all be in one room playing together, but that isn't always the case.



My daughter has a computer that she uses to compose and store the stories she writes. She does a great deal of research for both her story writing and school.



We don't watch much television and we don't have a DVR. If you don't want to make time to watch it the first time around, you don't need to record it for later.



As far as movies in the theater/cinema, that's something you may want to revisit later down the road. I know there have been times where there was absolutely nothing in the theater I thought my children should see. Conversely, there have been times where there were either a number of movies released that were worth seeing, or one movie they wanted to see more than once. Now that they are teens, this has happened more often. My 14 year old daughter saw Hunger Games three times in a week.



Technology is always changing, it's the nature of the beast. My junior year of school was the very first year that computer classes were offered, and the typing class used real typewriters and was not called "keyboarding." When our daughter was born, we didn't even have a cordless phone in the house, let alone a cell phone. Our internet was dial up and we'd only had that for a little over year. iPad? Heck no, it was a big, old bulky Walkman. By the time my children are ready to have children everything will have changed yet again. Enjoy your daughter and make your decisions as they come.

Answer 7

My daughter is Four and she hasn't got a TV in her bedroom but she does in her playroom (she has a wii and dance matt which she adores) but that's all she ever uses tecnology wise, and we all watch TV together as a family. I think that technology is becoming more significan't in childrens lives now however much we do to prevent this it is enevitable. The whole 2 movies at the theatre thing is a little weird, I mean for at least the next 10 years you are going to be the on taking her to the cinema so it will be up to you anyway and after that it's her decision really anyway.



We are quite a sporty and arty family anyway (Their dad is a Javelin thrower and Rugby player and I'm an Dancer and my mother and father are both artists and photographers) so the craft and sports thing comes naturally anyway!

Answer 8

We allow it. I think it's important to balance technology with other activities. There are benefits to it. My kids do not have TV in their bedroom, but we do have a Wii, which they play about once a week. We got as a gift, not something we would likely purchase ourselves.They also play games on the iphone and iPad every few days. Given the choice, they would much rather be outdoors or engaged in an activity with me, but that's not always possible. I think it;s fine to use technology in balance with everything else. It's part of our world, and part of their lives whether we like it or not. Also, we never go to the movies (well, rarely) not for any reason other than I choose not to spend the money.

Answer 9

When my daughter was a baby we had all kinds of electronic singing toys and moved around with flashing lights and all kinds of things. They were obnoxious, but she LOVED them. I think the technology is a good thing. If we were to try to play with another toy she would be bored in about a minute, but she could play with these other toys for up to 15 minutes at a time.

Now she is 4 and the Kindle Fire is one of her favorite things to play. We don't allow unlimited time on it, but when we are waiting for an appointment, taking a long car ride or when she's not feeling well it is a God-send.

She also does crafts, reads, plays with her toys and outside, but when she gets home from day care (she is there for 10 hours some days) sometimes she just needs to unwind. Think about how you unwind at the end of a long day. I bet it has something to do with a television or computer. Why deny that for your child if you are going to indulge?

My daughter doesn't play with handheld electronic games because we don't have any, same with an iPad and iPhone. Your child will only have as much technology as you do.

Answer 10

My kids have always and will always use technology. Technology is the future, like it or not. However, I am an artist and a muralist, they have been painting, drawing and being creative since birth. They play outside all the time and read and have excellent grades etc etc etc. We tend to not forbidden things that have no bearings on their well being. They do not sit idly and stare at electronics. But, wait till they get older. Try doing a report on nothing, because most kids are required to use technology to do a report.

My childhood sucked. My kids have it made.

Every single part of mine and my husbands life was different than our children's.

Answer 11

Our daughter is 2 1/2 and she obviously doesn't have her own iPhone or tablet. I guess I shouldn't say "obviously" because we do know several people whose very young children have their own devices. My husband and I have smart phones and every now and then she will "paint" with one of them or play some other little game. We also have an XBox Kinect that she is interested in, but not quite old enough to be able to play. So yes, she does have exposure to technology but overall she doesn't spend much time with it.



I still remember getting a Nintendo and watching my older brother and sister play Mario Brothers and Duck Hunt. I played when I was old enough and went on to have a Sega and a PlayStation, which I enjoyed immensely. But I never got too wrapped up in any games (like kids do these days with games like World of Warcraft) and my parents limited my time playing games, just as they limited and monitored my time on the internet when that got big. I had fun with all of it, but the majority of my time as a kid/young adult was spent outdoors and/or with my friends.



Moderation is key. It's more difficult these days because we're so inundated with the latest and greatest and communication has totally changed forever. But I plan on taking the same approach with our children rather than disallowing all of that stuff completely.

Answer 12

My girls are 13 and 15. They've had cell phones (basic ones initially) since they were 8 and 10.... mainly so we could keep in touch when they were involved in activities or at friends homes. They had supervised access to a centrally located computer from the time they were about two, and played little learning/kid games. Television and movies were viewed in common areas as well. At this point, they each have Android smart phones (with filters), netbooks (with filters) and televisions (with parental controls) in their rooms. Technology isn't evil if used appropriately and its use supervised/moderated by parents. The kids who end up in trouble with technology are the ones who are permitted to use it unchecked and unmonitored. My daughters are fully aware of the rules around their use of technology, and they're aware that I monitor everything they do. They know there are time limits on everything, and that they'll lose their technology privileges if they don't comply. They don't want to lose privileges and know I don't make idle threats, so they comply. They're not socially awkward in the least, are both very active and healthy, have tons of friends and are involved in many activities that don't involve technology. It's all about balance. Technology is a part of their world, and will be for as long as they live. As such, I see no point in sheltering them from it. Everything in moderation.

Answer 13

I have a 2 1/2 year old and I said the same things. He does have an IPad, BUT If you ask him if he wants to go outside or play the IPad, he would choose outside every time. Same with Painting, any kind of craft, playing in his room with his toys...he picks those over the IPad. Mainly he only plays the IPad if he is sitting watching his favorite show or at Drs Appointments (since I am 9 months pregnant, I have had TONS of Drs. Appointments and we use it to keep him occupied at those or he may play it in the car). All of his games are educational except one which is Temple run. They teach him shapes/colors/counting/alphabet..which honestly he knew all of those anyways except the alphabet we are still working on that one! If you limit it like anything else it can be a very useful thing. He has a TV in his room, which he rarely watches..usually when his cousins are over and they all watch a movie but with tv he probably sits and actually watches 30 minutes a day..because he normally has his hot wheels out playing with them. I do not believe in just letting a child sit and sit at a tv screen all day or computer..if it ever became a problem with my son where he didn't want to do anything but sit around and watch tv all day or play video games then there would be put a limit on it!

Answer 14

I have two girls, ages 2.5 and 5. They do not have an iPad, iPhone, electronic games, Xbox or t.v. in their rooms. I have a Wii fit that I use for exercise, and my girls have the dora dance game. They have never been to a movie theatre yet. In fact, we ourselves do not have an iPad, iPhone, handheld electronic games, Xbox or tv in our room and we never go to the movies.



The things you describe are by no means necessities for ADULTS let alone children.



"What is your approach on this?"

I don't have a particular approach. We just haven't felt the need to own any of the items you describe.



"How was your childhood?"

Fantastic. I grew up with a pool that we were in every day from May until September. We cross country skiied and downhill skiied, and swam in the winter at an indoor pool.



"And how different is it from your children's now?"

I don't think it's terribly different. The biggest difference is that we live in the country now so there are no other children around for them to play with. When we were little, we could just go outside and have someone to play with most of the time. But my oldest is outside ALL THE TIME.



I don't see your "approach" as particularly unique or unusual. I see it as quite normal.



EDIT - And we have one TV in our house.

Answer 15

i imagine, or favor to imagine, I have a extraordinarily good an an energetic mind's eye (I do quite some 'imaginative writing'), and that i each so often ask your self if my mind's eye used as a baby may be everywhere close to as usable now that I have 'grown up' and now no longer am a baby! in my opinion, No, i trust I nevertheless have an same factor of mind's eye for early existence video games, yet, that it does no longer get used because an same factor of delight from playing out those video games would not be executed. also, the position I once, as an get together may fly an imaginary airplane, made up of up a series of a few 6 - 8 chairs, i'd now have the data to enable the technicalities that could want to inhibit my play get contained in the way. Sash.

Answer 16

They had access to tech but not in their bedrooms until they hit the teen years..



My father was in the tech industry.. Tech was always in the house.. I.E. we had a Tandy within 6 months of it's release and upgraded regularly.. We got an Atari the week it was released etc. The tech stayed in the family room not in our bedrooms.. Didn't have a computer of my own until I reached college age.. I had more access to tech than most of my childhood friends..



My childhood wasn't much different than my children childhoods.. They got individual computers a bit earlier than I did simply because the price of computers is so much less than it was in the 80's and they grew up in a much colder climate than I did ...



It's all about balance while playing outside ETC is important learning to handle tech in this day and age is also important... With my children I used the weather to help determine what activities they did... Good weather get out and get doing things, bad weather tech more available to them...

Answer 17

I think you've rather missed that by the time your kid's old enough to be interested in technology, ipads and iphones will be a decade out of date. Absolutely no point making blanket rules now.



We don't have these things _as a household_, so it's not an issue. (We do have a TV, but it's a family TV. Nobody has a TV in their room. Nobody has an iphone. We don't own an xbox or a wii.)



Are my kids (they're 12 and 15) little saints who love reading, painting and embroidery above all technology? Heck no. But they do consider TV to be something we watch together when there's something specific on that we want to watch.

Answer 18

I encourage my kids to play outside a lot. If it isn't raining or freezing cold then they are outside. I also like to do crafts with them and teach them things like violin (I play) and guitar (fiance plays). But I also let them engage in things that have to do with technology because that's what their generation is going to be surrounded by and I don't want them to be set back. I don't let them play video games unless they are educational. I help them learn to use the computer by playing educational games online sometimes. They know how to use my android phone pretty well. There are some really good kid friendly apps that are nice to have when I need them to be quiet like waiting in a doctor's office.



I spent my childhood playing outside and making up games with my friends. I was always riding my bike, climbing trees and exploring in the woods. I want my kids to have a similar experience to that only I want to be more involved. It felt like my parents pushed me outside just to get rid of me.

Answer 19

please don't plan your child's life...he/she will plan her own..& yes even from day one...& if you have more than the one, you will realize this...I don't see why you can't balance it all...technology is a good thing, & so is socializing & street smarts..but to plan this all out is ridiculous..you will see that being a parent also means flexibility, while stability is a main factor also....it's great that you & your husband are discussing mgmt skills, but it should be more in the way you both handle the household & stick together on your discipline techniques...good luck, but just worry about who's gonna do what when the baby is up all night...for now...just take one step @ a time....& btw, congrats!!!

Answer 20

we're pretty open to technology, but we definitely limit time on them. My two year old loves to play with my husband's ipad, and he loves to watch movies, and he knows how to access netflix from the ipad. We try to limit screen time to one hour a day. Whether he's watching a movie, or playing a game or whatever he's doing, he gets one hour of screen time. We have a wii, and we let our kids play with it, but again, that is included in screen time. The only exception to the one hour rule is family time. We will frequently play a wii game together as a family. My son loves the sports resort games, and they are active games, and it's good family time, so I don't see the problem with that. It's not something we do daily, and its never for long periods of time. As he gets older and maybe will get more interested in video games and stuff like that, we will still stick to the one hour of screen time rule.

Answer 21

you are gonna make your daughter friking miserable..what is wrong with you.. all of her friends are gonna have electronics and shes ALWAYS gonna be the odd one out. Let her do what she wants.. if its not effecting her health than chill.. Shell be fine. She can still be creative and imaginative.. what happens when she has a boyfriend one day.. shes never gonna be able to call him and say good night because you wanna be physco parents. Get a life.

Answer 22

Your not going to have an iPad in your infant daughters crib? What kind of parent are you? Steve Jobs would be so disappointed.

Answer 23

Anything in moderation (eg. TV exposure) is good but I do think iPads for pre-schoolers is too early.

Answer 24

Yeah... good luck sticking with all of those. And really, your daughter isn't even born yet, and you're already making rules about her watching films in a cinema and having an Xbox?

Answer 25

Why not? If he or she can learn knowledge from playing and use "technology".I mostly support it.