should a child be allowed a dummy after a certain age?

Question

in the last week i've been walking around my hometown or going for family meals and i keep seeing 3-4 year old's with dummies still. i don't despise dummies or mothers that want to use them but i do think they should be taken away from a child at a young age (2 earliest, 3 the latest). when out for a meal with my daughter and my friend, a 4 year old came up to me and asked about my 3 month old, i couldn't understand him because was talking with the dummy still in his mouth. it may be hard to take it away but i think you have to have the patients to do so, otherwise don't give a child a dummy in the first place if you can't handle taking it away! i don't use a dummy as i like to see my daughters face, she doesn't need it anyway (most breast fed babies don't need them).
does anyone agree that they should be taken away at a young age?
for the mum's that let their child keep their dummy till they're 3-4-5, why do you let them keep it? please enlighten me. im curious and want to know.
thanks

Answer 1

My son was 3 yrs when I took his B away he also carried a blanket around,I mainly let him keep it because for one at night he didn't sleep good without it,second I didn't see a reason he shouldn't have it.It comforts and sooths them I have found nothing to support that it is unsafe or UNHEALTHY so why not let them have it??Just because someone else says that is ridiculous that a child that age has one is not a reason,I know my child and I will do what I feel is best.With my daughter I plan to take it away at 3 yrs also.

Answer 2

Yes i do think there should be a cut off point for a child to have a dummy

i think its silly when i see children (not babies) walking around with dummy's in there mouth!



a agree at the age of 2yrs old a mother should try and take there child off a dummy!



i know a girl that had a dummy up until the age of 8yrs old as her parents couldn't stop her! (hmm coudnt they of thrown it away)



and i also know another friend whos child never had a dummy even when they were a baby



these days its up to the parent really but the longer the child relys on a dummy the more its going to be harder to get off

Answer 3

I would not have been without a dummy for my daughter as it gave her so much comfort and definitely made night time and teething a lot easier for her.



She had it for night time only after the age of around 14 months and we got rid of it completely when she turned 2.



I think around 2 should be the cut off point as it just seems that they should be ready to leave the 'baby' things behind then. It is down to personal preference though, but I do agree that once they start talking it is nice to hear them talk, rather than mumble through a dummy.

Answer 4

Well I am not out to judge other parents over a piece of plastic and silicone that their child sucks on. It's amazing the judgements that are passed about something so stupid and such a personal choice. My daughter is 2 and a half and she still has hers, she uses it only at sleep time, she will not sleep without it. First we took away her bottle, now she doesn't wear nappies and basically I just didn't want to make all these changes at once. The dummy is next on the list but at the moment I just don't think she is ready to give it up

Answer 5

Like you I hate to see children with dummies once they're past around 12 months old (with maybe occasional use for 12 months after that during sickness or sleep difficulties). But more importantly, there's now strong evidence that dummies are responsible for a higher rate of ear infections as well as damage to primary teeth. Time to Ditch the Dummy!

Answer 6

My eldest never took to a dummy, but my youngest uses one. He has it when he's tired and cranky, and to go down at night, but he doesn't *need* it. He's 6 months now, and I aim to start weaning him off it soon and have it done by the time he's 1 at the latest.



Young babies suck for comfort - as my boys were bottle fed I couldn't just feed them like a breastfeeding mum could so I offered a dummy. I'd much rather that than they suck their thumb as that can cause extensive orthodontic damage - as I know from personal experience.



However, like you I agree that past a certain age it's quite frankly vile - and it's nothing other than laziness on the part of the parent. So you have a week of tantrums and tears - so what?! At least you get them off it!!

Answer 7

I have a two year old daughter, and a nephew who is only 3 months younger than her. My daughter took a dummy for a few weeks after she was born, and then wanted nothing more to do with it. My sister in law still gives my nephew a dummy. I agree with everyone else that once they start walking and talking they shouldn't need them anymore.

Answer 8

I think you should at least start weaning the baby off of a dummy at two, only give it to them for naps, and bedtime. I worked at a daycare and they recommend taking it away to promote independence in the child. I also think that children should not be having them all the time at that age because they can't be understood with them in their mouths. I have a two year old and he only has his for bedtime now if he's really fussy and won't go to sleep without it, he's almost completely off of it now and doesn't take it anywhere. But both of my kids were breastfed and both had dummies for comfort.

Answer 9

My 15 month old is breast fed, and although I prefer the word Passy, he needed it. Some children just have a strong urge to suck. It's normal. However, I totally agree with you, My sons has been gone for several months, after a year old, I firmly believe they shouldn't have a bottle or a passy. I actually saw a 7 year old at the store with one in her mouth recently. It's a shame! Can you imagine the dental bill that kids parents are going to have to pay?

Answer 10

my daughter is nearly 2, and she has a dummy, but, she only has it at bed/naptime....i think past the age of 2 or so having a dummy all the time is not needed, and often just a lazt parents way to shut their kids up, ask them whats wrong....it doesnt hurt to communitcate with your own child....i intend to try and have the dummy done with well before her 3rd birthday, but will see how it goes

Answer 11

I knew a child who'd been allowed to keep his dummy after the age of two, and had learned to "Talk" round it.

It was such a shame because it affected his speech even after it was taken away.

He was teased at school and eventually his parents had to pay for speech therapy. (It wasn't available on the NHS as the doctor said it was the parents fault)



If needs be I'd let my child have it at night but I'd be far too embarrassed to be seen with my 3 or 4 year old with it out in the street.

Answer 12

My son has just turned 2 and he still has his dummy. I'm ebarased to give him it when we are out because I agree it looks silly when children are walking, talking etc and still have a dummy in their mouth. I try to just give it to him when he goes to sleep but I am not successful. I guess I have poor will power. He never needs it in the house and I never give him it when we are home no matter how much he wants it but when we are out in the shops or standing in queues and he starts screaming I try at first to talk to him, or give him something to distract him but he just keeps screaming and shouting so I give up and give him his dummy and he's quiet.



So I guess my answer is poor will power and the embarassment of everyone looking at you and glaring because your child keeps screaming.

Answer 13

They seem to to let them have it to keep them quiet instead making an effort with them, we took them away from our kids at 3-4 weeks and they didn't notice. I do notice that a lot of children who have dummies when they are 3-4 yrs are very muc behind other children in talking, they tend to talk like babies even when they start school

Answer 14

best way to get rid of em is say father christmas wont come unless you give him your dummies. thats what my mum did with my sister because she used to walk around with a dummy in her mouth and one in each hand!... She soon gave em up (she was 3 by the way).. i have nothing against mothers using dummies but i do agree you shouldnt have them after a certian age.

Answer 15

Dummy's used over a long period pushes the teeth forward. This can lead to speech problems. Not only that but kids become dependent on them, causing big problems when you try to ween them off it. I recommend you not start your baby on them in the first place.

Answer 16

I was living with my ex-mother in law, and while I didn't want her using a pacifier she did. And gave it to her often. (I never heard the term "dummy" before, so I"m hoping that's it.)

Her excuse was "they're kids". "It's easier this way". and "who gives a ****"..



hope that helps.. I tried taking my daughters bottle away at one, and moving them on to "big girl cups" (sippys). It isn't the security blanket factor that bothers me, it's the dental issue. I don't want her having teeth that stick out too far and will cause her problems in the future.

Answer 17

I let my daughter keep hers because she had leukemia. It was one of the few things she got comfort from in what was a very hard and painful world.



Fighting the cancer became so much more important than teeth or speech or anything else. We could have fixed those things later. She died at 4 years, 9 months and yes she even has a soother in the casket with her.

Answer 18

That is far too old for a dummy

Answer 19

Yes, I am not against people using dummies for their babies but once the children are walking and talking I think it is vulgar and unhealthy

Answer 20

a dummy shouldent even be with a child because the child drops the dummy and starts crying and gets the dummy sticky and dirty and they stick it back in there mouth