Im pregnant, but my parents hate my boyfriend!?

Question

my parents have never been his biggest fans, but now since i'm pregnant they really arent. My boyfriend and i are both 17. They keep saying he isnt fit to be a father, whent hey are just judging his appearence. He is actually very excited about the baby.

what should we do?

this is him:
http://i939.photobucket.com/albums/ad231/waterMELon-is-good/33778591.jpg
http://i939.photobucket.com/albums/ad231/waterMELon-is-good/34161090.jpg
http://i939.photobucket.com/albums/ad231/waterMELon-is-good/l_b970ad1ee82d49bb82add28653518c31.jpg
http://i939.photobucket.com/albums/ad231/waterMELon-is-good/NewPicture.jpg
http://i939.photobucket.com/albums/ad231/waterMELon-is-good/l_a7b81ab0d20348c88236feb893a1a757.jpg

Answer 1

Since the two of you made this child together I feel you should do all you can to raise the baby together if you are financially, emotionally, and mature enough to. Your parents have every right to their opinion, and if you were my daughter I would feel the same way. Seriously consider all your options before making a final decision, and be completely ready to not have the support of your parents since there seems to be that friction. Maybe once your boyfriend can make good on his fatherly duties they will come around.

Answer 2

Don't completely discount your parent's opinion, they did bring you up after all. You should ask them why they feel the way they do; you might be surprised at their answer, and you may not like what you hear, but if it's the truth then that's what matters. It's good that Dad is excited about having a baby, but excitement doesn't make someone a good parent. It really depends on the level of mental and emotional maturity. Are either of you prepared to get jobs, possibly continue/end school, be financially independent...? There are so many wonderful things about being a parent, but you both need to be sure that you can raise your child to be a strong, caring, intelligent person. Children learn by example, they copy what they see Mommy and Daddy doing and if you aren't totally committed to each other and ready to be a team then that isn't the right environment to raise a child in.



Why does no one ever suggest adoption? It is an option, a great one if you don't think you can raise a child to be the best he or she can be. If you want your baby to have more then you think you're able to give then consider it. I happen to know a girl who was adopted, is connected with her birth parents and loves both sets of parents very much.

Answer 3

You need to be more than excited about a baby to be a good father or mother. Is he prepared and able to help with the childs support. Is he working? Appearance has nothing to do with being a good parent. My advice is try to work it out with your parents, as they will be a big part of your support system over the next while. Whether they like it or not, he IS the father and everyone may as well try to get along

Answer 4

No offense, but I find it funny that in one picture he has a condom packet in his mouth...



I agree with them. I don't think 17 year olds are ready for a baby. But, looking back and wishing it hadn't happened isn't what you should be doing now. You are pregnant and he is the father. As long as he is good to you and to the baby, that's all that really matters (mostly).



Since he is 17, perhaps he can get a job to help prove that he is better than they think he is?

I would strongly urge him to get a job. You could get a job as well.

Maybe if he started taking steps to show that he's preparing for the baby would get them to come around. He needs to do this even if your parents don't come around in the way they think about him.

He needs to get a job, take pre-natal classes with you, and plan for the future.

Where is he going to college? Where are you going to college? I would suggest at least one of you go and plan for a career.

Answer 5

I personally know exactly how you feel. I was 18 when I got pregnant with my daughter and my parents also disliked my boyfriend. He too was excited and we had many plans and at first is was ok maybe for the first few months but then I really wish I would have listened to my folks. He ended up being a deadbeat dad who hasn't seen her in over 6 years.

Answer 6

Have you thought about alternatives to having this baby? 17 is young and you realise a baby means nothing is ever going to be the same. No sleep, diapers, reduce social life, weight gain, reduced fun, body shape changes plus lots of money!

Just think about it. I wouldn't want to bring a baby in to the world in your situation. Maybe in 10 years time you will be in a better position and won't have to deal with conflicts like this because you will be out on your own not needing your parents approval.

Answer 7

In my opinion, you really shouldn't care what they think, especially if they are judging based on appearance. You will be 18 in a maximum of 12 months (assuming yesterday was your birthday), so they won't be able to do anything about it.

Answer 8

Why did you feel the need to post his pictures?Lol. :p

Anyways,I know what your going through,I was 16 when I got pregnant & my parents didnt like my boyfriend,I kept telling them that he loves me & the baby & guess what happened?3 years later he knocked me up again & hasent been seen since! So parents can be right sometimes.



For now,try to show your parents that he's trying.Urge him to get a job,show them that he respects you,& show them that he's mature & responsible.

Answer 9

well, they're right. no 17 year old is fit to be a parent, though. but honestly this really isn't the place to do this. you shouldn't let total strangers tell you what you should do with this.

Answer 10

well if hes excited thats great your parents have to accept him no matter what he is father of baby. goin thru preg scare and bf is not too excited :/ wish me luck and good luck to u

Answer 11

am with ur parents on this one



looks like a freak



i wouldn't want to be stalk in a lift with him