CAN SOMEONE HELP MY STRESS AND ANXIETY PLEASE!?!?!? PLEASE READ?

anonymous

2013-12-27 08:02:56 UTC

My 2 year old son is special needs. He has been diagnosed with severe autism but they feel something else is also wrong. He has been going for constant blood tests, urine tests, therapies, eeg, mri, and other tests he needs to be "put under" for. They think he has an underlying genetic disorder that they are searching for.

My wife is currently pregnant and is due in March. My sons problems didn't get very bad until after she was already pregnant otherwise we would never have planned it even though we wanted to. There is a major risk to our new baby if a genetic disorder is found in my son.

I'm a stay at home dad and took care of my son alone but it got overwhelmingly difficult. I have always had stress and anxiety but not severe enough that a few beers of hit off the peace pipe couldn't cure.

But that stopped working and I found myself abusing these substances to get the same effects. I stopped being able to sleep because of my anxiety. Like clockwork I woke up at 2-3AM with a resting heart rate between 120-135. Im a health 32yo man. This still happens but not as severe.

The tipping point was when I couldn't concentrate and thought I was going to pass out or have as heart attack. The have had pressure/tightness in my chest and tingling emanating outward to my arm and left side. I checked my pulse and it was 140bpm. Went to the ER and they ran many tests and said I was healthy but having a panic attack. My follow up doctor prescribed me Buspar and xanax.

I have severe side effects from the Buspar (mind going a mile a minute and can't concentrate on anything specific, and I was an emotionless shell of myself) and don't like taking it because its hard to concentrate, smile and take care of my special needs son while on this medication. As a result, I stopped taking it and used only the Xanax (I'm prescribed 2mg a day) Sometimes I take none, sometimes .5mg sometimes up to 2 mg, depending on what stressful event my family is going through that particular day. I don't notice the "xanax rollercoaster". I usually try not to take xanax 2 days in a row be avoid my body needing higher doses for same effect (the off days are usually when I have a few beers or smoke.

I know this is not the means by which a doctor would recommend but it is working in the short term. I don't want it to be a long term solution but I'm not sure what my other options are, given my problems with taking the Buspar.

Taking the Xanax in this manner (mixed in with occasional alcohol and marijuana self-medication) seems dangerous for a number of reasons and I dont want to rely on this long-term.

My question is in regard to Buspar... I was told I just need to get past the initial hurdle of the side effects but I can't take in for more than 5 days without feeling like I'm going crazy and need to stop the medication. I need to give 100% of my attention to my son and I can't do this on these meds. Will the side effects ever go away? Should I just fight through it at the expense if my son not getting what he needs for a week or 2? I would consider this if I was sure my sacrifice (and his) would pay off after taking the Buspar longer. I don't like the idea of permanently being on any medication because before these family problems I was very healthy and only had mild, manageable stress/anxiety.

Any help would be very helpful!