i have a son who is 22 , no car , i take him everywhere , i have to ask for gas money.?

Question

i take him to work every night at 11 pm i get up for work at 530 am.. he never says thank you when i drop him at his jos at 11 pm . just bye and gets out, he says he is saving for a car but i heard he was going to purchase a new laptop for 1500.. i had a total fit , i said it was a bad choice to soend car money on a computer , now i have the decesion to make of not taking him to work anymore if he does get this laptop.. tough love ? i know i know 22 no car , he is my first born so i feel like i have to help him out , but i do dislike people who enable there kids to be lazy and not help them to make good choices.. so i am stuck in a parent rut , HELPPPPPPPP.....

Answer 1

I think you just need to explain to him what it is like to be you in this situation. Let him Know that as his mother you arn't just going to abandon him, but that it is time for him to grow up and think about his future. You can't be the one to drive him to work forever and you have to get up early for your own job. Im sure a laptop sounds great to him, but maybe you need to remind him of what a car would mean. He wouldn't have to bug you all the time to drive him places and he wont have to rely on others. If this doesn't work then maybe set a time limit of say 4 months for him to get a car. If he doesn't have it by then, then he will have to find his own way to work. Tough love, I know, but sometimes you just have to do it. Good luck!

Answer 2

Really, now isn't the time to see where you went wrong, 22, drive back and forth and have to ask for gas money, OH HELL NO. See that is why there are so many lapsy daisy young men out there, because of parents like you who refuse to let them grow the hell up. Then there is also a such thing as public transportation, let him get a bus card or token, whatever it might take for him to be independent. I really hate to tell you this, but, you won't be around always to transport, he should learn the skill of commuting voluntarily, before it becomes mandatory. Cut the apron string and put homeboy on the bus. God Bless.

Answer 3

damn. I'm sorry but your son is a SCRUB. If my kids didn't have a job by the time they were 18 and they had no direction in life, you know what I'd do? Pack their stuff while they were out, leave it on the front porch, change the locks, leave a sign on their stuff and tell them to find a place to stay. Sometimes tough love is really what they need. I want my kids to know the meaning of a dollar. and the meaning of hard work. Now, I'm not completely cold-hearted, if they were really, REALLY struggling, then I would definitely help them out, but to baby them? Now that's completely out of the question.

Answer 4

cut off the internet service to his laptop. quit waking him up. and let him know you are done enabling him. grow up or get out.

its time to be a man. it sucks i know you hate to do it. but for your own peace of mind and stress level you need to do it.

Answer 5

I would say about time to move out