Teens don't have any "real" problems? Really?

Question

A few days ago, an adult & me were talking, and she said, "You sure are lucky you're a kid, there really is nothing for you to worry about. All you teenagers think you have it so bad, and you guys don't have any real problems!"

I know she wasn't trying to, but honestly, it infuriated me. Her comment was ignorant & insensitive. What exactly are "real" problems? She doesn't even know me, or my life.

Where do you stand on this? Do you feel that teens really have no "real" problems?


*** I put it here because most of you guys are adults, and I'm comfortable here.

Answer 1

they mean real adult problems like mortages, jobs, divorces.. but they dont kno that cuz ur a teen ur not goin thru any of that?!? im 19, n had my baby at 18, a mortage at 18,a job at 16 and married at 18!!

so jst cuz your a teen doesnt mean you dont have problems, no .. just ignore them hunx

Answer 2

Teens can have worries just like adults....maybe just not on the same level. While it wasn't my job, when I was a teen I used to worry about everything- will the rent get paid, utilities,etc. Now that I'm adult, I'm not worried about that because I know it will be. I've been in and out of DHS custody, never really stayed in one place very long. Lost friends, only one to death the rest because of DHS and moving. I've been at my most stable after I turned 18.



Adults- those that live on their own have bills to think about, car payments and other stuff like that. Teens generally don't have to worry about having a roof over there head and food in their belly. Some may however just depending on the sort of life they have lead. If I led a "normal" life growing up, to be honest I probably wouldn't have worried about stuff like that.



Teens can have problems. It don't help that the media makes it like the only thing teens care about is having cell phones and all that un-necessary stuff.



Health problems don't discriminate against anyone. Children, teens, adults and elderly each face health problems.



My mom's best friend's daughter is 25 and has had countless of heart surgeries and ever since she was a CHILD they have been telling her she didn't have longer then 6 months to live. She has moments where she's doing great then not so great.

Answer 3

I think this is a very rude comment to make, I am an adult.

Teenagers lives are hard, for me it was very hard. I had and still have a lot of emotional issues to work on. Life can be hard for anyone at any stage of their lives, teenagers go through so many changes and its very difficult to get through for some people, the struggle of whats right and wrong and why things are happening in your life that you never had to deal with before... being a teen is a challenge.

Being an adult is also difficult but in different ways, you have kids to worry about, a job and a house. Everyone has a difficult time at some time or another wether it be teen, adult or the elderly. Lifes hard for everyone!

Answer 4

My boyfriend is 16. His mother is extremely ill and dying. She was given a month to live. His parents are in a nasty divorce. His entire family is in debt, and their house was just foreclosed on. What more "real" problems would an adult have to deal with? Exactly, none. We face the same problems as adults. I'd like to give that lady a nice swift punch to the face. real problems my A S S!



Actually, my boyfriend has a full time job so he can contribute to the family to help them pay enough bills so that they can even live! His father doesnt give two shits and the mother is too sick to move from her bed! He does EVERYTHING so actually I'm sure my boyfriend has A LOT more problems than half the adults on here. And guess what, he's a teenager. Shove that up your woohoo.

Answer 5

The vast majority of teenagers aren't dealing with adult situations and relationships, having to support yourself and others. It doesn't sound like a lot, but the level of problems an adult has is lightyears away from the level of problems a teenager has.



You may have some responsibility as a teen, but it's no where close to an adult's life.



You are right, we could be wrong and you may have a career, and a home, bills, and adult relationships, but we dont know.





*****************

"Peer pressure, drugs, sex, bullying, self-esteem issues... You have no idea" ---yes when you have so little life experience those seem like huge problems, i remember, i thought so too. Then when i got older, i got a taste of bigger problems and realized what was dealing with as a teen, really wasn't so bad.



**************



As I mentioned, we don't know. If this person knew you and your medical problems, yea, it's a huge insult



Kind of baiting the crowd by not disclosing that upfront, dont ya think?

Answer 6

Looking back my problems as a teen I can see now how they were not "real" problems.



For a teen a lot of their problems are more self aims. They want their parents to leave them alone, they want their parents to let them do stuff their other friends can do, they the cool things their friends have, boyfriend problems & friend problems.



Adults problems are more aimed at supporting ones self or family. A job, money, insurance, medical bills, food & shelter. Things people need to survive.



Will a teen die without a boyfriend, a cell phone or not being aloud to go out late?? No.



But an adult will die without food or proper shelter.



Does this make sense?



I remember how HUGE problems were as a teen. I was teased, school was boring and i could careless about school work.



Adults do need to respect a teens worries and problems. They shouldn't be ignored & what this woman did was rude.



I admit I want to roll my eyes when I see here on YA a teen saying "HELP PLEASE THIS IS IMPORTANT" then question is something like "Why won't he text me back?" Is that really important enough to scream for help??? No.

Answer 7

Well I am an "adult" so let's discuss this.



Most adults think that kids have no "real" problems that are really meaningful. They hardly have any money problems, responsibilities, or whatever. This is basically true for the most part. I get annoyed when adults presume kids have no real problems. They have problems, however insignificant they are to adults, they are still REAL problems.



However, I do think kids barely have anything to complain about. Besides having the nervous feelings from dating, getting your driver's license, that major test in school, looks or whichever. They are all overall not real problems in the long run.



You are mainly just feeling infuriated, because it sounds so condescending to you, whether intentional or not, it builds up. IMO, besides working and paying bills, which aren't very hard, adults have nothing racking on their nerves. Just work and everything is fine. paying bills is SOOOO hard, wah wah wah.



In conclusion, kids have a LOT more to worry about, but it's all irrelevant to their survival. Making money is more important than fitting in at school, which is their main argument I presume.

Answer 8

I lived at home as a teen and went to school.



Now if I dont make it work I might loose my job which means I loose my house and cant buy food to feed myself and family. Worrying about homework and boys seemed like such a big deal in high school... Now, I wish those were my problems.



Not that those are worries of mine right now, I actually have a pretty decent job and a nice house filled with a hubby (also works), daughter and 3 doggys.





ETA - I do understand some teens have much bigger problems and I feel for them. Its hard enough dealing with some of this crap as an adult.

Answer 9

When you're a teen, you're hormones are like wildfire, and it causes a lot of emotions. It's like you think that the world is against you, when it's not. Now that I'm 21, looking back on my teen years I think that I had it pretty good. The real troubles I was facing were schoolwork and my social life. Now problems are more serious like paying the rent on time, keeping a stable home for my son, getting up every morning and going to work, not being able to see my family as much because of work... there's a bunch load more that you'll get when you get there. Enjoy being a kid while it lasts. Many take it for granted.

Answer 10

If you ever picked up a newspaper, it's full of real problems. Unemployment. Homelessness. No health care. Taxes and more taxes. War- there's always war. Laws you must obey, and won't. Needy dependents. Now, ask yourself, how lucky are you that you'll never be concerned about any of that in the future? Don't forget to vote. Now that you're even more furious, do something about it.



Start with raising your grades and working toward a career with a strong future. You'll become very intimate with "Ignorant and Insensitive", though, in the years to come.

Answer 11

there are certainly teens with real problems. serious illness, addictions, abuse, gangs, homelessness, etc.



there are also an awful lot of teens who feel like they have real problems, that are honestly important to them, but that's because they're missing a sense of scale. e.g. the person they have a crush on doesn't like them back or they got a bad grade on their biology test or their best friend is no longer talking to them or they're not allowed to go to the mall.



adults fall into both categories, too. some are as melodramatic as teens stereotypically are. but generally speaking most teens have an adult who cushions them from the really major things, whereas the adult who can't pay the bills or whatever doesn't have that, and is potentially going to be out on the street.

Answer 12

When I was younger my parents used to make me so mad when they told me to quit complaining because I had no worries. Looking back, they were so right. I wish all I had to worry about was making good grades and maybe a sport and part-time job. I miss my only bill being my $60 for car insurance. Now I have to worry about bills, cooking, cleaning, housework, my son, yard work, everything. I just found out my son's insurance ends in 2 weeks and he was denied for renewal because we make $300 too much. I called DHS and the lady told me to quit my job since I can't get health insurance through my job anyway. And if I quit my job I could get food stamps too. So basically my 1 year old cannot get health insurance. There's a "real" problem for you. I wish I could go back in time and smack my teen self for being so stupid.



edit- To person who said what more real problems could adults have that teens don't have.

If home is foreclosed, who has to figure it out? The parents. If parents are getting divorced, who has to go to court and deal with a spouse leaving them? the parents. I'm not saying the teen doesn't deal with it too, but think about it. The teen just has to be stressed out for a little bit, but they think "It'll be ok, mom and dad will figure it out." Just like my son losing his health insurance. Yea, that's technically his problem, but guess what. I have to make all the phone calls and fill out all the paper work and get stressed out and cry because what am I going to do. Yea your power go cut off, but who's going to come up with the money to get it back on? Mom and Dad are, not you. This is why adults have more problems. We usually figure it out for you guys.



EDIT- I'msorry about your condition. I understand those are real problems. I was talking about the teens that really only have to worry about school and maybe a part-time job and complain all the time. Had you told us all information first and asked if the woman was wrong to say that, I may have answered differently. Yes you have been through alot and you do have real problems.

Answer 13

I would be pissed too. Most people assume that just because you're young you don't deal with "real" things. However, not only do teens have to deal with things that to an adult seem trivial but to a teen seem like life or death due to hormones etc. But on top of that many teens do deal with "real" things. I'm only 19 and have probably dealt with a lot more than many adults! At 11 my parents seperated and my mom had to work all the time to support my sister and I so I was left home alone and was responsible to doing my own laundry and dishes as well as making the meals for everyone on top of doing my homework and my other childhood responsibilities...and yes I was still a child. One year later my father died and then I felt really alone. Not only did mom have to work More because my dad wasn't giving atleast some finacial support, but I no longer had my father. I played an big role in helping my mom plan my fathers funeral...now what kid has had to to that? For the next several years my ill grandmother was in and out of the hospital on a regular basis. I spent many afternoons after school as well as full days sitting in the hospital with her watching her slowly wither away. And when she decided she needed to "get things in order" because as she put it to me " I won't be here next christmas" she picked me to help her with that task. She left me with several responsibilities for before and after her passing. And when she did pass in November I was left with the majority of Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners to make. Because, according to my principal and the school board, I "missed too much school" being with my grandma in the hospital/again helping with funeral preparations and toting relatives to and from the airport... I was Failed Due to Absences for the whole first semester of my senior year. Because I had so many credits and such high grades in my all-honors and AP classes I was able to graduate fine but it was still BS. I walked with only my mom and sister there to see me since the other important people were ill or deceased. During my middle school and high school years I also dealt with a friend with a cutting problem. My best friend's bulimia problem, 2 friends attemptimg suicide in which cases I had to alert school counselors to intervene and prevent them, my aunt and 2 close friends succeeding in suicide, and another good friend dieing in a car crash. Also, when I was 15 I took care of my baby neice for 6 months in between going to school and attempting to have a social life. Now I'm 19 and have to take care of my Grampa because he can no longer take care of himself. I clean his house, do his shopping & laundry, cook him meals, drive him to and from dialysis and his other Drs appts, etc. I am also 35wks pregnant. So if anyone ever told me I'm lucky to be a carefree teen with no REAL problems....I'd probably punch then in the face.

Answer 14

Here, I'll give you a problem that teens in years past have had to deal with: The draft.



Problems are relative. You see problems based on whatever you already know.

Answer 15

you know what, i'm 18... i'm pregnant... and i agree with adults who say this. no, it doesnt apply to all teens.. but seriously. you have a free home, free food.. you have everything you need provided, whether you think so or not. i think back to when i believed that yeah teens had real problems too! but i'm growimg up a lot faster than a lot of the teens i do know, im not even friends with most of them now. the only friend i keep in touch with is 26.. and thats because i got extremely tired of teens bitching about their terrible parents and their boyfriend notbeing allowed to sleep over or their parents not giving them any money.





as a teen, you dont have too much to worry about unless you are out on your own.

i'd kill to go back.





edit: by the way.. to those being all, "i've been to hell and back" and "sex, drugs, peer pressure." blah blah blah. whatever. yeah, thats stuff you come across no matter your age a lot of the time... a lot of people do go through hell, but thats life. i've been to hell and back too... i dont ***** about it, i dont ***** about the stuff teens ***** about. and thats because i've been out on my own and i've had to do stuff for myself...

Answer 16

hmm. how do i say this diplomatically?



i believe that problems feel very real to teens when they are going through them, but once those teens have matured, the problems more often then not feel insignificant at best compared to the stress of the "real world".



that being said, i do think it was rude of her to insinuate that your life is easy, because to you, it's not. i don't know a single person who thinks that their life is "easy", no matter their relationship status, race, socioeconomic status, or, yes, age.

Answer 17

"Peer pressure, drugs, sex, bullying, self-esteem issues... You have no idea..."



Ah, but that is where you are wrong. We do. We didn't start out as adults. We went through all the same crap that you are living with, and we made it to the other side. Now we're living with new hell. And you know what? You have no idea. But you will.

Answer 18

Really? how could someone say that? im a teenager and ive been to hell and back. sure we arent adults but you dont have to be a certain age to have "real problems" wtf? dont mind what she said.



edit: sure we do have to worry about homework and school stuff but thats not even a fraction of what some teenagers go through.

for example, what if they have a friend thats thinking about suicide. or their parents are splitting up. or if they have an abusive father that abuses his wife and what if they are going through some financial problems and the father keeps on asking for money? or what if its all of the above? try living with that

Answer 19

Well it depends, i know quite a few kids who have real problems, but also a few kids who just think their life sucks when really they are just whiny emo fuccks who think having to take out the garbage is worth cutting yourself over.



so it all depends on the individual persons situation.

Answer 20

I agree that her response was ignorant and insensitive. I do not feel that your problems are not real. Some have it worse than others and some do not have any one to rely on for guidance.

Answer 21

Of course teens can have problems, even little kids can have problems. Robbery, abuse, rape, poverty, extreme family issues, etc. can happen to anyone of any age.

Answer 22

Well I have to agree u do have it made in school and the only problems you have are who's cheatin who but other than that u don't have problems

Answer 23

When you're an adult it will make more sense to you. Of course some teenagers have "real" problems, but typically their biggest problem is who has a crush on who, and remembering to do your homework.

Answer 24

ur right sweetie.. that comment was very ignorant..... "real" problems have nothing to do with age....

Answer 25

Peer pressure, drugs, sex, bullying, self-esteem issues... You have no idea...

Answer 26

Real problems....you'll know all about them when you grow up.